June 2, 2002
Sometimes at night when I can’t sleep, which is painfully often lately, I’ll press myself up against his back so that every inch possible is touching him, and I’ll just concentrate on feeling him breathe, listening to the beat of his heart, smelling his hair, running my hand through his curls and over his skin, memorizing every inch of his body with my own.
I just get this overwhelming feeling, something I really will never be able to describe properly, like my heart is just going to explode simply because I am lying next to this incredible person. Just being there, in that perfect moment with him, seeming as though time has stopped and there is absolutely nothing else going on in the world, makes me so unbelievably happy, euphoric, as if I can’t catch my breath, having to cry just to get this ecstatic swelling out of me.
Never in a million languages will there ever be adequate words for me to get across, or enough time in a million years to express sufficiently, how glad I am of his existence… exactly how much I love him… this beautiful man.